The original twelve steps:
1: You decide that you are going to get over the hurt and the pain and the shame and survive as you have done always.
2: You learn about yourself that once you have really committed to something you are not the kind that can let it go no matter how much you try.
3: You learn that there are always more songs, movies & books on sadness than on happiness they just don't make it to the main stream.
4: You can lose a life's worth of fitness in a year's worth of depression.
5: You learn sleep loss is mandatory and it is directly proportional to hair loss. That doesn't mean you are awake when you are not sleeping.
6: Your personal hygiene goes away very fast. Its pretty gross.
7: You as a child have known tears of sadness and happiness. You learn a new kind. You learn death doesn't only mean the stopping of one's heart.
8: You learn its the goodness in you the empathy the kindness the loyalty that makes you the saddest. Its totally moronic yet utterly true. You are just defective.
9: You start the withholding of yourself and boxes to hide your mind from the world are made. This process is extremely painful if you are somebody who used to give life everything you had.
10: You begin building vaults of many kinds 12 x 10 ft ones, 15.6' ones, 63 hp ones, 0 mm2 ones. There are so many it just doesn't really matter. The human mind is wonderful that way.
11: Your own rationality goes away. There comes a point when every failure every sadness every shame in the world is your own and you are punishable.
12: You know in your heart of hearts that the only way to get past this is to let in people you love and respect, but you cant you just fucking cant. You cant believe you are the kind to deserve such a kindness.
1: You decide that you are going to get over the hurt and the pain and the shame and survive as you have done always.
2: You learn about yourself that once you have really committed to something you are not the kind that can let it go no matter how much you try.
3: You learn that there are always more songs, movies & books on sadness than on happiness they just don't make it to the main stream.
4: You can lose a life's worth of fitness in a year's worth of depression.
5: You learn sleep loss is mandatory and it is directly proportional to hair loss. That doesn't mean you are awake when you are not sleeping.
6: Your personal hygiene goes away very fast. Its pretty gross.
7: You as a child have known tears of sadness and happiness. You learn a new kind. You learn death doesn't only mean the stopping of one's heart.
8: You learn its the goodness in you the empathy the kindness the loyalty that makes you the saddest. Its totally moronic yet utterly true. You are just defective.
9: You start the withholding of yourself and boxes to hide your mind from the world are made. This process is extremely painful if you are somebody who used to give life everything you had.
10: You begin building vaults of many kinds 12 x 10 ft ones, 15.6' ones, 63 hp ones, 0 mm2 ones. There are so many it just doesn't really matter. The human mind is wonderful that way.
11: Your own rationality goes away. There comes a point when every failure every sadness every shame in the world is your own and you are punishable.
12: You know in your heart of hearts that the only way to get past this is to let in people you love and respect, but you cant you just fucking cant. You cant believe you are the kind to deserve such a kindness.
